111.

Sometimes I feel like I’m stuck in my comfort zone. It’s nice and cozy and non threatening. I basically stay home, mostly by myself, and clean, cook, and binge Netflix.

Then I get the feeling that I should step out of my comfy bubble and do something scary. I reach out and try to make a plan with someone and they shut it down. They don’t realize how hard it is, and it sets me back, and I never want to leave my bubble again.

This time, I’m not reaching out. I know what the response will be. I don’t want to be rejected again. So I’ll stay in my bubble and everyone else can go fuck themselves.

110.

Things are so much better at the moment. Our house is decorated for Christmas and everything looks so cozy and cheerful. Christmas always puts me in an instant good mood. I love the planning, cooking, and general bustle of it. My shopping is all planned out and I just need to complete my purchases. All the food is planned and mostly bought. There’s just a few things left that need to wait until the last minute. Right now, things are good.