We’re at the point where we need to move. My husband hates his job, and I hate where we live. Both the town, and the house. It’s such a hard decision to make, do we just move houses, and stay at the same job that he hates so much? Or do we move provinces, preferably to move back home to B.C., and give up the money we’re making to live with uncertainty?
When I’m at my worst, my husband is at his best. He always knows how to distract me from the demons in my head. When he can’t distract, he comforts. He is by far, the best thing that has ever, or will ever, happen to me. He is my life, my love, my world. He is perfect.
I saw a post on Pinterest the other day from Tumblr, about how depression is like trying to peel a potato with another potato. It’s not fun and it doesn’t work, and you just want to cry.
Then people are like, why don’t you just get a peeler? And they hand you another potato. That sums up exactly what depression is, and how people think you can just get over it.
It’s funny. I can pinpoint the exact time depression set in this time. I was sitting on the couch downstairs watching Gilmore Girls while my husband was out watching the niece and nephew play soccer when it happened. I think it was being left alone for too long and too often that did it. That usually affects me in some way, but this time it was bad. I hope I’m not in it for very long. I have such a hard time getting through the hole to see the light at the end. I know it will get better, and that it always does, but sometimes it feels like forever before it happens.
And then a dark cloud passed overhead and it decided to hang there.
Words can’t even express how excited I am for Christmas! It’s my favourite time of the year, and favourite holiday. This year we’re going out-of-town and staying in a hotel all by ourselves. No family, or other people to deal with. We’ve made reservations at a fancy restaurant with a great buffet for Christmas dinner, and are planning to do Boxing Day shopping instead of gifts.
I usually put my Christmas decorations up after November 11th, but the last couple of years I’ve been putting them up at the beginning of November, just because I can’t wait. This year will probably be no exception! By the time this post goes live, I’ll probably have everything up. I just love Christmas!
Things are still good. It’s been almost a month since I’ve had to deal with people and it’s made such a huge difference in how I’m feeling. I haven’t had any restless legs, or had to take any meds (except this one time but that was more because of overstimulation and things). Over all October has been a pretty good month.
Right now, at this exact moment, things are good.